The mess hall of the MBV Roidrunner’s Regret was abuzz with the slow-burning chaos that only a patch day could provide. The crew—miners, haulers, and opportunists alike—sat clustered around datapads, mugs of synth-coffee, and a running argument about Mordunium, stockpiles, and how many lies a patch note could legally contain.
“Just reduce the volume of the ore,” muttered Ragmar Ohu, dragging a finger across a half-empty spreadsheet like it owed him money. “They say they’re worried about buffing stockpiles. Then just make the rocks smaller.”
“Yeah,” replied NWABroseidon, tapping rapidly into a price index, “but the only way people actually dump their hoards is if the market’s worth it. You want movement? You gotta make mining and selling not feel like self-harm.”
He glanced around, daring someone to argue. No one did. He added flatly, “GG no re.”
From across the room, Aykira Sl4ker chuckled. “At least that panic dump in Jita helped me buy enough pyerite to build an entire Orca family. Thanks, hysteria.”
“Yeah, well now that everyone’s realized the buff was a nothing burger,” NWABroseidon muttered, “prices are crawling back up again. Like roaches. Disappointed roaches.”
“Hey,” someone said, “what’s this bit in the patch notes? ‘Empowering highsec miners to act on the pyerite shortage’?”
“‘Empower them to f*** off,’ more like,” NWABroseidon replied, without missing a beat.
“Is this the third time this happened?” asked aegeahg, flipping through old market charts.
“Ya.”
A notification pinged on someone’s pad.
“5% mord, man.” NWABroseidon groaned. “That’s it. I’m going to bed.”
“It’s 08:40.”
“Exactly.”
Meanwhile, over at the newbie end of the table, RupKilla was having a revelation.
“Yo,” he asked, “can a covert ops Venture mine while cloaked?”
A slow, sympathetic silence followed.
“No,” said Erika Akiga, gently. “Can’t lock targets while cloaked. Goes for all ships.”
“So I just… cloak when someone shows up, then?”
“Exactly,” Munyi Mishi added. “Cloak, hide, don’t die. Basic survival.”
Epice RuinedEpice nodded. “Also lets you dodge gate camps, be sneaky in wormholes—real handy.”
RupKilla blinked. “That’s a pretty cool mechanic.”
“Yup,” said bogusman Aideron. “Warp to a ping, cloak mid-warp, just don’t try to dock while cloaked or touch anything. Cloaking is like introvert mode—you want to not interact with the world.”
Later, as the caffeine wore off and the pyerite market continued its dramatic impression of a rollercoaster on fire, Munyi Mishi checked her index again.
“Seems folks really did offload their pyerite stocks,” she said. “Price is tanking.”
Cube Collider grunted. “Mordunium buff. Wow.”
Dariisa Asiirad looked up from her mining laser calibration manual. “Stop. Get help.”
“I didn’t say anything!” Cube snapped. “WTF.”
Across the room, Macuna Hatata shook their head silently, staring at a market window like it had betrayed them personally.
A final message pinged.
aegeahg: “Scordite got a 10% buff if anyone wants to make a trip to HS.”
No one moved.
A Pixel Nomad 